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    Guzer.com Jokes: How World Works

    Let's see if I understand how the world works lately...

    If a man cuts his finger off while slicing salami at work, he blames the restaurant.

    If you smoke three packs a day for 40 years and die of lung cancer, your family blames the tobacco company.

    If your neighbor crashes into a tree while driving home drunk, he blames the bartender.

    If your grandchildren are brats without manners, you blame television.

    If your friend is shot by a deranged madman, you blame the gun manufacturer.

    And if a crazed person breaks into the cockpit and tries to kill the pilot at 35,000 feet, and the passengers kill him instead, the mother of the decease blames the airline.

    I must have lived too long to understand the world as it is anymore. So, if I die while my old, wrinkled butt is parked in front of this computer, I want you to blame Bill Gates...okay?